Hey I'm Jesse and I'm kind of a gigantic asshole but people still kinda like me for some reason. I'm 19 years old and a 4th year computer science major at UCSD. I work at Amazon in the summers in Seattle and will likely work there full time after I graduate.

Follow my boyfriend coyotetale.tumblr.com he's pretty rad.

Harry Potter, StarKid, ASOIAF, TWEWY, Kingdom Hearts, ROTG/GOC, Final Fantasy, homestuck, pokemon, occasionally personal text posts, etc.

Feel free to ask me anything if you'd like to know more about me for some reason. Or Skype Jesseduarte94, or kik slaughtermatik. I love new people.

 

lessonsinorgasmicblowjobsessions:

coldswarkids:

edwardspoonhands:

thelegendofkungjew:

doxian:

d-dinosaur:

rknjl:

newvagabond:

NO “TELEPHONES”. TALK TO EACH OTHER. FACE TO FACE ONLY. WRITE A LETTER. SEND A TELEGRAM TO YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 1860. LIVE.

NO ‘WRITING’… TALK TO EACH OTHER. THROW A ROCK AT YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 10,000 BCE.  LIVE.

URGGA. ROU GRAAURH. RUH.
<SMACKS HANDS ON WALL WITH PAINT.>

NO ‘HIGHER BRAIN FUNCTIONS’ …USE YOUR REPTILIAN BRAIN
EAT YOUR MOM’S CORPSE SHE DIED TO PROVIDE YOU WITH SUSTENANCE
PRETEND YOU HAVE JUST AROSE FROM THE SEA
SURVIVE

NO “MULTICELLULAR TRAITS”….. USE YOUR SYMBIOTIC MITOCHONDRIA
REPRODUCE ASEXUALLY, YOU’RE YOUR OWN PARENT
PRETEND IT’S 2BYA
EVOLVE

NO “LIFE.” USE FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICAL FORCES TO FORM SPHERICAL OBJECTS REVOLVING AROUND ONE ANOTHER IN SPACE. 
FUSE HYDROGEN INTO HELIUM USING GRAVITATIONAL PRESSURE TO PRODUCE HEAT AND LIGHT. 
PRETEND IT’S 4.5BYA.
STABILIZE INTO EQUILIBRIA

NO “MATTER”.  EXIST IN THE VOID WITHOUT PURPOSE OR MEANING.
THERE IS NO “YOU”, ONLY THE VAST CONCEPT OF NOTHING.
TIME DOES NOT EXIST.
BE.

Photos like this remind me of

lessonsinorgasmicblowjobsessions:

coldswarkids:

edwardspoonhands:

thelegendofkungjew:

doxian:

d-dinosaur:

rknjl:

newvagabond:

NO “TELEPHONES”. TALK TO EACH OTHER. FACE TO FACE ONLY. WRITE A LETTER. SEND A TELEGRAM TO YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 1860. LIVE.

NO ‘WRITING’… TALK TO EACH OTHER. THROW A ROCK AT YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 10,000 BCE.  LIVE.

URGGA. ROU GRAAURH. RUH.

<SMACKS HANDS ON WALL WITH PAINT.>

NO ‘HIGHER BRAIN FUNCTIONS’ …USE YOUR REPTILIAN BRAIN

EAT YOUR MOM’S CORPSE SHE DIED TO PROVIDE YOU WITH SUSTENANCE

PRETEND YOU HAVE JUST AROSE FROM THE SEA

SURVIVE

NO “MULTICELLULAR TRAITS”….. USE YOUR SYMBIOTIC MITOCHONDRIA

REPRODUCE ASEXUALLY, YOU’RE YOUR OWN PARENT

PRETEND IT’S 2BYA

EVOLVE

NO “LIFE.” USE FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICAL FORCES TO FORM SPHERICAL OBJECTS REVOLVING AROUND ONE ANOTHER IN SPACE. 

FUSE HYDROGEN INTO HELIUM USING GRAVITATIONAL PRESSURE TO PRODUCE HEAT AND LIGHT. 

PRETEND IT’S 4.5BYA.

STABILIZE INTO EQUILIBRIA

NO “MATTER”.  EXIST IN THE VOID WITHOUT PURPOSE OR MEANING.

THERE IS NO “YOU”, ONLY THE VAST CONCEPT OF NOTHING.

TIME DOES NOT EXIST.

BE.

Photos like this remind me of

(Source: agirlandhisplatypus)

misbehaving-musician:

professor-whom:

family-of-poops:

lifeofadisneykid:

thewritingfortress:

fuckyeahassortedstuff:

FOR KIDS

OMG I GET THE REFERENCE

I DON’T SO PLEASE EXPLAIN IT TO ME.

Oedipus killed his own father then married and had children with his mother

and after he found out it was his mom he stabbed his own eyes

History’s definition of a motherfucker, essentially

Please be careful about using the term “history”.

There seems to be quite a big misconception that Oedipus was a real person.

(He was not)

(Source: disnerdherd)

iridium-flames:

whoreisawhoreisawinchester:

iguanamouth:

i think its funny how there are some actors who played a role for so long that its almost impossible for me to see them as anything else

image

and then there are some actors who’ve done so many roles i dont even see them as actors anymore it’s just them as themselves in another movie

image

and then there are actors who you’re not quite sure what they really look like

image

#johnny depp the best cosplayer

Toddler: Mama, I L-L-Looo

Mother: You love me?!

Toddler: Long ago the four nations lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked. Only the Avatar, master of all four elements could stop them, but when the world needed him most, he vanished. A hundred years past and my brother and I discovered the new Avatar, an Airbender named Aang. And although his airbending skills are great, he has a lot to learn before he's ready to save anyone. But I believe Aang can save the world.

vocaloidtonio:

the name connor originates from the gaelic name ‘conchobhar’ which is said to mean something along the lines of ‘wolf/dog lover’ so essentially - anyone called connor is a fucking furry.

(Source: crowborn)

megablaziken:

I love how you can cancel a Pokemon’s evolution by pressing B like how would that work in real life do you just scream “NO” as your Pokémon starts to evolve and it complies out of fear

http://sarahanndippity.tumblr.com/post/92496003306/radycat-what-gets-me-about-most-ya-young-teen

radycat:

what gets me about most YA/young teen books is the authors usually never write convincing friends’ dialogue? ??? ?? Like friends dont talk like that??? Are they even friends or acquaintances? ?? Where are the sexual come ons followed by the vows of marriage and then the “imma…

What kind of friends do you guys have my friends and I are all the sass all the time

ammit420:

horror movie synopsis

  • white family moves into house
  • the house got some shit in it
  • family refuses to acknowledge that they got some shit in they house
  • turns out that shit is some ultrashit